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  • Writer's pictureChristina Cunningham Spinler

Money Talks: Partner Questions

Discover the path to financial harmony with your partner through the use of this comprehensive list of questions.

Take your time. Choose a few questions at a time to focus on and work together to build a strong foundation for your financial future.

1. What does money mean to you?

2. What is your biggest fear around money?

3. What do you need to feel safe when we talk about money? What do you need to feel safe when we talk about how you spend or save money?

4. On a scale from 1-10 how often do you think about money?

5. On a scale from 1-10 how do you feel just talking about money?

6. What are your hopes and dreams about money?

7. How did your family handle money while you were growing up, and how has that shaped your views on money management?

8. What are your short-term and long-term financial goals?

9. How do you prioritize spending and saving? What are your top financial priorities?

10. In what ways are you willing to adjust your current spending habits to align with our shared financial goals?

11. How do you approach debt, including any existing debts and taking on new debts?

12. What is your approach to saving for retirement, and how do you plan to achieve your retirement goals? Talk about EARLY retirement, age 50?

13. How should we handle unexpected financial challenges or emergencies?

14. What role do you believe each partner should play in managing the household's finances?

15. How do you feel about combining our finances, such as opening a joint account or sharing credit cards?

16. What are your thoughts on financial independence within our relationship?

17. How do you propose we set a budget for shared expenses, such as housing, groceries, and entertainment?

18. What are your thoughts on investing, and how do you approach risk in financial decisions?

19. How do you feel about supporting family members financially, if the need arises?

20. What is your approach to charitable giving or supporting causes you care about?

21. How should we approach financial planning and decision-making as a couple?

22. What are your expectations for lifestyle changes (e.g., travel, housing, leisure activities) as our financial situation evolves?

23. How do you feel about financial transparency in our relationship?

24. What steps do you think we should take to prepare for major financial goals, such as buying a home or having children?

26. Is there anything you're currently doing to improve your financial literacy or understanding of personal finance? Would you be interested in doing this together?


I have a few questions related to money that are similar to the above questions but worded slightly differently.

1. How did your family handle money while you were growing up?

This question is aimed at gaining insights into your partner's financial upbringing and how it might influence their current attitudes towards money management.

2. What are your short-term and long-term financial goals?

Understanding each other's financial objectives can help align your goals, whether it's saving for a house, planning a vacation, or preparing for retirement.

3. What's your comfort level with debt?

Different people have varying attitudes towards debt. By discussing this, you can prevent potential conflicts and ensure that you are on the same page.

4. How do you approach budgeting and spending?

Understanding each other's spending habits can help in creating a joint approach to budgeting that works for both partners.

5. How should we handle financial decision-making and management as a couple?

Deciding whether to merge finances, maintain separate accounts, or have a hybrid approach is crucial in setting expectations and responsibilities to avoid future conflicts.

6. What does financial security mean to you?

This question delves into each partner's definition of financial security, which can vary widely from one person to another.

7. How do we prioritize spending on necessities, savings, and luxuries?

Discussing priorities can help couples create a balanced budget that reflects both partners' needs and wants.

8. How will we handle unexpected financial challenges or windfalls?

It's important to discuss strategies for dealing with financial emergencies (like job loss or medical bills) as well as unexpected gains (like bonuses or inheritances).

9. What are your thoughts on supporting family members financially?

This can be a sensitive topic, but it's crucial to understand each other's expectations about supporting parents, siblings, or other relatives.

10. How do you feel about investing and what are your investment goals?

views on risk tolerance and investment strategies can help in planning for the future and ensuring both partners are comfortable with the approach.

11. What role should financial planning and professional advice play in our lives?

Discussing the value of financial advisors, tax professionals, and other experts can set the stage for making informed decisions together.

12. How will we approach charitable giving or contributions to causes we care about? Understanding each other's values and priorities can help couples allocate resources to support those causes.

13. What's our plan for retirement savings and planning?

Early discussions on retirement planning can help ensure that long-term goals are aligned and achievable.

14. How do we define and manage lifestyle inflation?

Discussing how to manage increases in spending responsibly can prevent future financial strain.

15. What financial legacy do we want to leave, and how do we plan for it?

This question urges couples to think long-term about wealth, estate planning, and the impact they wish to have.



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